Sometimes It Just Wasn't Meant... Thank God For That!

Can you ever get over your first love?  ...Heck yeah!  *lol*  Seriously, was he your first love if he had no love for you?  That's my thinking on the matter.  You may have loved them, but they didn't love you, so... I'm not sure if they deserve the title "first love" because it wasn't reciprocated.  The man that reciprocates it will be my "first love".  *smile*

Someone asked me recently if there was still a spark between my ex and I.  [Admittedly, it was an interesting and yet somewhat annoying question since I did break up with him 4 years ago and our interaction is very intermittent.  True, I haven't had a boyfriend since, but it's not because I'm still in love with my ex.]  My answer was "Ummm... not on my end.  ...I would go so far to say we were never meant to be together.  We were meant to just be fellow classmates.  ...I believe we all play a role in other's lives, but I don't believe his role was to be the man of my life."

Sometimes things don't work out because they weren't meant to work out.

Sometimes we try to fulfill a role in someone's life that we aren't meant to fulfill

and are asking them to do the same thing.

I know we don't like to hear this, but...

sometimes the things we desire aren't meant to be obtained,

which is why we can't get a grasp on it.

Sometimes we try to make that acquaintance, neighbor, fellow classmate, co-worker

our friend or lover

when they are meant to play their current position.

Not the one you wish them to play.

Yes, not getting what we want is disappointing,

but I'm sure you can look back and confirm that things you once wanted

you now know were no good for you.

It may have hurt then, not getting what you desired,

but even what causes hurt and pain is beneficial.

Be glad for stepping stones that appear to be pitfalls, downfalls.

They, too, build you up.

Our heartaches are/were a direct result of someone not knowing themselves.  S/He didn't know themselves, their role in our lives (friend, "Hi-Bye" acquaintances, or even that "dude/chick") and we didn't know ourselves enough to know the difference, to know that they weren't meant for us and we weren't meant for them.  [Now, them not being the wo/man you deserve doesn't make them "a bad wo/man" or even "less of a wo/man", it just make them "not the wo/man for YOU".]  Count it as a blessing--it didn't work out because He has something better in mind.  So don't be afraid to get over your 'first love', just be wiser, more connected with God and therefore self, so that when the next guy/girl comes along you will be able to discern whether s/he is wo/man enough for you.  

So, can you ever get over your first love?  Yes, when you realize that they probably don't deserve such significance in your life story.  "First love"?  That's deep.  Again, the man that reciprocates it will be my "first love" (and that man, I believe, will be my last love).  Furthermore, I don't place all blame on my ex for unfortunate woes that I've experienced because I CHOSE to be with him for whatever reasons.  All decisions we make are followed with a consequence.  Sometimes they are good, sometimes they are bad, sometimes they are long- or short-term, sometimes they are irrevocable.  Mine just happened to be a consequence of the heart, but I'm confident that they are revocable, that scars can be healed.

With love there are no regrets.  Just learned lessons.

"Every relationship is an opportunity to grow spiritually.  Take the blame off "them" and take responsibility." (Unknown)